I really wanted to write about things I see in the world today. Really. Because then I can take the focus of the burning toast in my own toaster and place it on the toast in someone else’s.
Most folks familiar with bible stories know the Israelites spent 40 yrs (give or take) in the desert after being led out of slavery by Moses. When they first tasted freedom, they weren’t emotionally or spiritually ready for the responsibilities of freedom. They spent that time in the desert learning how to become obedient followers of God.
In my recovery, I feel like that is where God has me. This morning, in checking my social media feed (a habit that can be good or bad, depending on where our hearts are at) I felt envy rise in my heart. I asked God why my life didn’t look like some of my recovery friends. I want to “shop” their lives, because of course I don’t want all the other stuff I know about, just the parts that they have that I want. Nice huh? Feelings of hypocrisy also convict me and I cry out for help “God, make me willing to be willing!”
So, downstairs I go to make my coffee this morning, and God and I start talking. I tell Him I know I’m in the wrong for coveting someone else’s situation, and that the things I have in my life someone else would love to have in theirs right now. And the things I wish I had that I don’t are a direct result of my desert location. Much like the Israelites, I bought my ticket to wander the desert by my lack of responsibility and obedience. God is waiting for me to submit the character defects in my life where discipline and focus are concerned, so he can move me on to bigger and better things. But I am not really spiritually or emotionally ready for those wonderful things until I develop the ability to submit.
Maybe you are in the next tent over, for whatever reason. Struggling with seeing your mates move on into the land of opportunity, doing things you want to be doing, but the doors are not open. You have plenty of blessings that have been given you, freedom from slavery to your addictions and habits, but you, like me still struggle with old mindsets and attitudes. God is waiting for us to hand these over to Him so we can “break camp” and cross over into the beautiful land He has for us.
But in my distress I cried out to the LORD; yes, I prayed to my God for help. He heard me from his sanctuary; my cry to him reached his ears. Ps 18:6 NLT
Have a beautiful Sunday my friends.