Well, we all get to a point in our path, where, after climbing a long section, we lean or sit for a moment and catch our breath. That is what it seems like I’ve been doing lately. I have been trying walk out some particularly rough spots in my recovery, and in doing so, have had little mental space to write about the larger picture. If that makes sense.
My blogging is an extension of my process, and I invite my readers to walk along with me. But sometimes I have to be so deeply immersed in where God is taking me, I am just not in a place to construct a public service announcement about it. So, for the last little bit I have been quiet. Something else my recovery program has taught me. That as important as what we say and what we do, it is as important that there are times we do not say and do not do.
Kind of like when you are in a conversation, and it is in the white spaces that you hear more than the words being said. So, if I am careful to listen more than I babble on, I am likely to learn more and God will use the opportunity to speak to me in that moment. But if I am too busy trying to figure out my next verbal “move”, then I am not tuned in, I am waiting for my turn.
Tonight, I picked up one of my favorite recovery books, and it flipped open to character defects, and highlighted was the section on using gossip or self-righteous anger to fuel our feelings of superiority, something that I have struggled with time and again. It was interesting to note that we are to use perfection as our measuring stick, but be encouraged by progress, not perfection. The upshot is to keep the progress moving. Not to stop and just give up because it seems unattainable.
I actually have loose-leaf notes tucked in here too. So I will write some more on this later. Suffice to say, God is deepening my recovery where it comes to my communication and my thought life, to keep my side of the street clean and to not have a higher or lower opinion of myself than I ought. There is an old saying out there, which I am trying to implement in my life, attributed to Socrates (“so-crates” for you Bill and Ted fans!)
“Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, weak minds discuss people.”
Indeed. Let us fix our minds on the ideas of how to creatively work our recovery to the best of our ability and to honor God, ourselves and others in the process.
Much love and big hugs.