Sometimes I find myself quite busy. Busy with the tasks at hand, of life, of family, of my recovery. We all can pull up a virtual to-do list that is longer than our day. This list of chores, duties, considerations, etc can nag us like our parents did to clean up our rooms or do our homework.
Today, God literally pulled the plug on my busy-ness. A small windstorm came up, but with enough force to knock out the power and the internet here at the house. That meant no work-from-home, no busy housework to keep me engaged. Just me and what’s left of the battery on my laptop and my cell phone.
The Word says to be still, and know that I am God. In recovery, we have all sorts of sayings, or clichés if you will, that say “Take it easy” “One day at a time” and so on. These all point to taking it slow and easy, letting the process work and being yielded to it. I remember being so gung-ho when I first entered recovery. Kind of like those little dogs that bark and jump because they get so excited by everything. That’s kind of how I felt. I saw healthy people and I wanted that too. Like, now. No, I mean NOW.
But, as they say in recovery, “Time takes time” and it isn’t just a bumper sticker. It really is true. Some things cannot be rushed. My heart needed to heal. I needed to establish trust, with others and myself.
I saw a movie over the weekend that I was very excited about seeing. It had humor, some pathos and a ton of action. It was a sequel, and I remembered the first installment having more “breathing space” in it. If you cram too many action sequences into a movie, sometimes it can just feel frantic and overwhelming, especially to someone like me. Same as life. I need “white space” or interludes…quiet where there is space between the crisis and growth. But since I am not the best judge of where to place these “spacers”, God sometimes helps me out.
So, this will post to the blog when I have connectivity once again, and ramp back up to the regular schedule of events. Meanwhile, there are some books I’ve been meaning to read.
Much love and peace…and quiet.
Achieving the quiet is not easy, for sure. I struggle with it. I’m trying to build a meditation habit, for example. And I can’t quite get into the routine. Too many distractions. Too much business in the way.
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