Boy, the character flaws are coming fast and furious as I enter the fourth year of recovery. If they were bricks to the head, I would be getting a CAT scan for the resulting concussion.
Attending group tonight, and as usual, really enjoyed the music (guest musician) and the teaching by one of our group leaders on a doing a daily inventory. That is, keeping things tidy on a daily basis and avoiding tartar or resentment build-up. Kind of like flossing, but for your recovery.
So as I am chewing on that to consider application and new ways to properly apply the lesson, a good friend in recovery, Jim (for the sake of anonymity, names are changed unless otherwise specified) came up and was chatting with me about some of the challenges he knew of in our family. It’s no secret that my life has been a challenge lately, and I live it in the open, so to speak. I shared plainly, and he asked how he could pray. It was typical for him to ask and very welcome. I shared a little more and we ended our discussion as he got pulled away to help with some chairs and tables.
Coming home, I reflected on how grateful I was to have someone ask about how they could pray, and that I couldn’t recall even one time asking Jim how I could pray for him. Not that we hadn’t prayed for him and others in our recovery groups. There are posts on social media, things shared in passing and among friends that will spur us to pray for our fellows in recovery and in general.
But to ask someone directly how we can pray for them? I considered it at length this evening, and it roots back into social anxiety. I am basically afraid to ask someone something so personal. I don’t mind telling you almost everything I have said and done in the last 50 years, but to ask you the same thing seems nosy and impolite. And not that I am comparing a simple, kind statement like how can I pray for you to tell me your life story. But it feels like that to me. I guess I need to just get over it, and submit this irrational fear to God, because it has now bubbled up and is a hindrance to my growth.
So grateful that God lets me see these little opportunity areas that need tending, and that I am willing to be part of the change I want to see in my life.
Have a lovely weekend my friends!