It has been mostly cloudy with some rain. Hardly any blooms left for me to bring in and put on my table to enjoy.  The sun does not shine on them long enough for them to really open properly, so my flowers stay closed up in tight little balls, waiting for enough warmth to open, warmth that is months away.

At times, I can wait on the warmth of a kind word or favorable circumstances in my life to generate a positive flow of emotions. Someone or something to make me happy. Because of course, if everyone would just cooperate and do their part, life would be so much more smooth and satisfying. My colors would be bright and vivid. I would finally find happiness and contentment.

Well, I am sure by now you caught the tongue-in-cheek tone of that last passage. Happiness and joy are an inside job. If there is not enough sunshine or external stimulation for me to get the kind of nutrients I feel like I am in need of to bloom and thrive, then it is up to me to be willing to make the necessary changes to my life. What kind of people do I surround myself with? What kind of activities I do or don’t participate in? And, examining the kind of soul-food I feed myself in order to keep my joy and serenity.

When I take personal responsibility for my life by turning it over to the care of my creator, I move away from holding others hostage to my need for validation and approval. I no longer need to seek out people to justify my existence. God tells me that I am sufficient as-is, with Him as the center of my being, and no one or nothing else. I can be at peace and rest in the fact that this joy and serenity is unchanging, and cannot be wiped away by a grumpy mood or my failure to perform some task or duty.

God is clear on this; I don’t need to buy, acquire, cajole, coerce or otherwise pull my self-worth out of someone or something else. He is it.

Step 3 states: “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God…”

Again, I am drawn to the concept of willingness and choice. God endowed us with that choice long ago, sometimes it is moment to moment affair. Today, I choose to be the best I can, in this moment.

For there is a certain beauty in even a partially opened flower, as it pushes its petals open, with what little warmth there is. May I reflect the beauty and warmth of God today.

Much love, my friends.

G’night.