Writing this on a Wednesday morning because Tuesday night snuck up on me, and I didn’t want to just write 3 sentences of “yeah, day went great, see y’all later…”. So, here we are.
I am still surprised some days at how the time has flown by. I don’t recall being ready to enter my 50’s. I want to turn the clock back to my mid-30’s, along with the maturity and recovery I now have to be able to get my self better situated for life now. Which is a silly argument, because I am the sum total of the last 20 years of difficulty and ignorant stumbling around in the dark. Every mistake and misstep has been yet another opportunity to shape the soul that now longs for more time to “get it right”.
But all I am certain of is the here and now. There is no yesterday to go back to, there is no tomorrow to count on. I can make plans that I will do this and such in a month or year, but really, things change so fast, I’m lucky to know what I’m doing next week, much less next month.
So, I depend upon God and His provision in my life for strength to move forward, even when the way feels like I’m driving down a foggy roadway, with 10 feet visibility, and a hope there remains a hard surface underneath my tires. My hope and faith does not spring blindly, however. I have the assurance that even though I have little idea where things are headed a lot of the time, I am loved by and cared for Someone who does.
I need to catch a little breakfast this morning and set to getting a few things accomplished, as the day seems to be leaking away. The sun is warmly shining on my wood floor though, and I am doing my best to resist getting a soft mat to curl up on, and soak in the glow like a lizard. The rainy cold days will be here soon enough.
Have a lovely day y’all.